At a time when it feels like weddings aren’t merely a major milestone in one’s life, but a meticulously orchestrated moment, the task of planning one can feel daunting. Likewise, with the constraints of tradition loosened, the brides and grooms of today have far more scope to let their imaginations run wild—which can either feel wonderfully liberating or intensely overwhelming, depending on your personality type.
That’s why we’ve turned to some of the industry’s most sought-after wedding planners for their advice on how to cut out the noise, and create the wedding day that you actually want. To begin with, it’s helpful to get a sense of how you both want your relationship to be reflected by your celebration. “I like to get into the couple’s story: how they met, what they love,” Mindy Weiss, who recently planned Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco’s Santa Barbara wedding, tells Vogue. “I think that helps us get to know each other better and gets my creativity flowing.” Johanna Carlsson, who helped plan actors Michael Fassbender and Alicia Vikander’s nuptials, places similar importance on the couple’s history: “Once I have that, every decision we make becomes purposeful.”
Of course, it’s the personal touches that will make your wedding unique, from the food you serve your guests to the music. “I like to build a complete picture of the couple,” Pearl van den Ende of Pearl, Rock and Raven, the planner behind Charli XCX’s Sicilian wedding this summer, explains. “I ask what their favourite restaurants are, what music they like, what their favorite cocktail is, and what matters most to them. Their wedding must be a true reflection of them as a couple.”
While it’s easy to be influenced by trends, it’s best not to worry too much about what other people are doing. “Move away from Instagram,” Mark Niemierko of Niemierko, who planned Rochelle and Marvin Humes’s 2012 nuptials, and their 2022 vow renewal, says. “It isn’t built for originality. It rewards repetition, which is why so many weddings end up looking interchangeable.”
Rather than going over-the-top with multiple elements on your big day, be intentional about the mood that you want to create. “Thoughtfulness always outshines excess,” Carlsson notes. Do you really need a flash mob, followed by a Mariachi band, and a fireworks display? Drama is far more effective when deployed sparingly.